This Helps Explain Archers ;-)

2lumpy

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An Oklahoma Kid's first Bow and Arrow set

Life as a child growing up in Oklahoma....

Around age 10 my dad got me one of those little badass compound bow beginner kits. Of course, the first month I went around our land sticking arrows in anything that could get stuck by an arrow. Did you know that a 1955 40 horse Farmall tractor tire will take 6 rounds before it goes down?
Tough sumbich.
That got boring, so being the 10 yr. old Dukes of Hazard fan that I was, I quickly advanced to taking strips of cut up T-shirt doused in chainsaw gas tied around the end and was sending flaming arrows all over the place
One summer afternoon, I was shooting flaming arrows into a large rotten oak stump in our backyard. I looked over under the carport and see a shiny brand new can of starting fluid (Ether). The light bulb went off in my head.
I grabbed the can and set it on the stump. I thought that it would probably just spray out in a disappointing manner. Let's face it, to a 10 yr old mouth-breather like myself, (Ether), really doesn't "sound" flammable.
So, I went back into the house and got a 1 pound can of pyrodex (black powder for muzzle loader rifles).
At this point, I set the can of ether on the stump and opened up the can of black powder. My intentions were to sprinkle a little bit around the (Ether) can but it all sorta dumped out on me. No biggie, a 1 lb. pyrodex and 16 oz (Ether) should make a loud pop, kinda like a firecracker you know?
You know what? Screw that I'm going back in the house for the other can.
Yes, I got a second can of pyrodex and dumped it too. Now we're cookin'.
I stepped back about 15 ft and lit the 2 stroke arrow. I drew the nock to my cheek and took aim. As I released I heard a clunk as the arrow launched from my bow. In a slow motion time frame, I turned to see my dad getting out of the truck... OH SHOOT! He just got home from work. So help me , it took 10 minutes for that arrow to go from my bow to the can. My dad was walking towards me in slow motion with a WTH look in his eyes. I turned back towards my target just in time to see the arrow pierce the starting fluid can right at the bottom. Right through the main pile of pyrodex and into the can. Oh shoot.
When the shock wave hit it knocked me off my feet. I don't know if it was the actual compression wave that threw me back or just reflex jerk back from 235 fricking decibels of sound. I caught a half a millisecond glimpse of the violence during the initial explosion and I will tell you there was dust, grass, and bugs all hovering 1 ft above the ground as far as I could see. It was like a little low to the ground layer of dust fog full of grasshoppers, spiders, and a worm or two.
The daylight turned purple. Let me repeat this... THE FRICKING DAYLIGHT TURNED PURPLE.
There was a big sweet gum tree out by the gate going into the pasture. Notice I said "was". That sumbich got up and ran off.
So here I am, on the ground blown completely out of my shoes with my thunder cats T-Shirt shredded, my dad is on the other side of the carport having what I can only assume is a Vietnam flashback: ECHO BRAVO CHARLIE YOU'RE BRINGIN' EM IN TOO CLOSE!! CEASE FIRE. DAMN IT CEASE FIRE!!!!!
His hat has blown off and is 30 ft behind him in the driveway. All windows on the north side of the house are blown out and there is a slow rolling mushroom cloud about 2000 ft. over our backyard. There is a Honda 185 3 wheeler parked on the other side of the yard and the fenders are drooped down and are now touching the tires.
I wish I knew what I said to my dad at this moment. I don't know - I know I said something. I couldn't hear. I couldn't hear inside my own head. I don't think he heard me either... not that it would really matter. I don't remember much from this point on. I said something, felt a sharp pain, and then woke up later. I felt a sharp pain, blacked out, woke later....repeat this process for an hour or so and you get the idea. I remember at one point my mom had to give me CPR. and Dad screaming "Bring him back to life so I can kill him again". Thanks Mom.
One thing is for sure... I never had to mow around that stump again, Mom had been bitching about that thing for years and dad never did anything about it. I stepped up to the plate and handled business.
Dad sold his muzzle loader a week or so later. I still have some sort of bone growth abnormality, either from the blast or the beating, or both.
I guess what I'm trying to say is, get your kids into archery. It's good discipline and will teach them skills they can use later on in life.

Bring back any childhood memories?
DC
 
I have NO reason to doubt the validity of this, now the funniest thing I've read in ANY forum, in years!

Thanks for the story!

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Funny stuff!

I too learned, at a very early age, that there are few problems in life that cannot be solved with the proper and liberal application of gunpowder!

"whackin' a surly bartender ain't much of a crime"
 
2lumpy, you win hands down but i had my moments too.

Up the ranch when i was 10-12, there was ammo in every drawer, nook and cranny, lots of different kinds, much of which was brought home by my Uncles from their stints in the military. One day, i found a bunch of 50 caliber machine gun stuff so took a few with me down to the shop.

I wanted to take one of these huge rounds home with me but thought i'd take the powder out first. I drilled a small hole in on the case and dumped out all the powder. So far so good. What i had done maybe could have gotten me hurt i guess but i did it and all went well.

Next, i took another live round and put it in the big ol vice with the primer facing up. I wanted to see just how big a bang that huge ol cartridge would make. I looked around on the bench at the old assorted greasy tools with intention to bang on that primer, to make her blow.

I never did find a good way to do it, in my mind, that day or a couple others later on, and the moment/idea passed. To this day i don't know what would have happened but i figure it good that i didn't ever find out! :)

Joey
 
Ya!

Kinda brings back some Memories!

I still wonder if some of the 3.0-6.0 EarthQuakes in KALI ain't still man made today?:D

And No,I'm not mentioning any names!:D

For GAWDS Sakes Guys,We Got Kids on this Site,Some of them are 65 years Old!:D

I don't care if they're big or small!
If they throw lead I like em all!
:p
 
Good catch,.45--- I never saw the first episode of this funny story.., and I'd bet it aint the last time it pops up in here. Its a good story, I just wish they'd post it under a thread called: a funny story I heard from my neighbor. And not try to pawn it off as their own. But oh, well...

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LAST EDITED ON May-23-11 AT 07:27PM (MST)[p].45, tageater,

Your absolutely right, I should have made it clear it was a funny, fun story that reminded me of my childhood exploits and figured it might do the same for ya'll.

Somehow I foolishly assume that the Oklahoma setting would have clarified that but how the hell would anyone know that but me? I was shortsighted for sure. I missed the story on it's MM maiden voyage. Wouldn't be that difficult to check on that the next time. I'll do that.

I was poking a little fun at my archer friends too, not that their anymore likely than the rest of us to have a checked past.

Thanks for not crushing my mistakes.

I'll still put one up once in a while but do my best to make sure the folks know it's the real deal or if its just internet folly. (Much of what we put up here is folly, or so I've come to believe.)

DC
 
LAST EDITED ON May-23-11 AT 09:09PM (MST)[p]I found out when I was about 10 that a match was a perfect fit in the end of a daisy bb gun. Pump that sucker up ten times and that match would shoot far and pretty darn straight. It was all fun till I shot someone walking around with it. You would think a wooden stick launched out of a bb gun at blistering speeds wouldn't hurt too much. Well it wouldn't if the dern thang hadn't lit on fire on contact with the intended target. Ever been impelled with a wooden stick whose end that was burried under your skin was on fire? Yeah, ouch!

I swear! I had shot tons of those matches and never once did one lite! Guess that'll teach me.

After the scalding I decided to show everyone I hadn't intended to lite my cousins arm on fire so I quickly launched anoter one across the house at an unsuspecting lazy boy recliner. Well son of a beech! The friggin thing lit again and boy howdy do those lazy boys lite up quick.

Lets just say I quit shooting matches out of my bb gun!
 
Reading that story was like dejevu for me.
I once filled an arrow 80% full of pyrodex, capped it with a 209 shotgun shell primer, taped a steel BB to the primer, drew back on my mean neighbors aluminum shed.....wow!!
Peeled that shed like a banana!!!
 
Pretty sure I've read THAT story in here before! Nice try slammy!

That's a BHWAR story! I'll go look for the link, but I'm sure of it! Lmao! Funny stuff-


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I'm not touching this one. That hits way too close to home and I'm quite sure my mom would still kick my butt to this day if she knew some of the things we did. The scary thing is, I've got kids and I pray that they aren't like their dad.


It's always an adventure!!!
 
Tag....I told that story once before on here but in much greater detail, its certainly not from BHWAR.....she wasn't smart enough to figure a bomb out for heavens sake...don't insult me like that, geeez!!
 

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