The Man Rules.........

AZStickman

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2,371
The Man Rules???????????????????
At last a guy has taken the time to write this all down


Finally , the guys' side of the story.
( I must admit, it's pretty good.)
We always hear " the rules "
From the female side.

Now here are the rules from the male side.


These are our rules!
Please note.. these are all numbered "1 "
ON PURPOSE!

1.. Men are NOT mind readers.

1. Learn to work the toilet seat.
You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down.
We need it up, you need it down.
You don't hear us complaining about you leaving it down.

1. Sunday sports It's like the full moon
or the changing of the tides.
Let it be.

1. Crying is blackmail.

1. Ask for what you want.
Let us be clear on this one:
Subtle hints do not work!
Strong hints do not work!
Obvious hints do not work!
Just say it!

1. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.

1. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That's what we do.
Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.


1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.
In fact, all comments become Null and void after 7 Days.


1. If you think you're fat, you probably are.
Don't ask us.

1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one

1. You can either ask us to do something
Or tell us how you want it done.
Not both.
If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.

1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during commercials..

1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.

1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.
Peach, for example, is a fruit, not A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have no idea what mauve is.

1. If it itches, it will be scratched.
We do that.

1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act like nothing's wrong.
We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.

1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answer you don't want to hear.

1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine... Really .

1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as baseball or

motor sports


1. You have enough clothes.

1... You have too many shoes.

1. I am in shape. Round IS a shape!

1. Thank you for reading this.
Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight;


But did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping.
 
You're right it is good,and it is soooo true.


_/|,[___]
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()_) ()_)---)_)

Tom
A conclusion is the place where you got tired of thinking.
 
I'm all for the new toilet seat rule! I received a royal butt chewing and about got run out of a friends house by his pit bull wife not too long ago.

Tom, What's up with this :) Pretty cool ,but...
_/|,<___>
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()_) ()_)---)_)

You got too much time on your hands dude!!

Joey
 
Sweet rules. Printing them out to post on the fridge. Looks like im going camping tonight.


Looks like a jeep to me!!

_/|,<___>
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()_) ()_)---)_)




If quizzes are quizzical, what are tests?
61.gif
 
Guys, listen to some good advice from a old ornery fart who has been there and done that in 40 years of marriage.
When your wife goes shopping for a new sofa, you go with her on that one occasion. Reason being so you can test it out to be damn sure it is comfortable to sleep on.
My wife will not even shop for a new sofa unless I am with her to test it out. She got tired of my b$tching about the sofa about 2-3 sofas ago.

RELH
 
RELH,

You are so very right. The last couch my wife bought is about 4" too short to lay down on. In my opinion a worthless piece of furniture. But did I go with her?? NOOO, So I have to put up with a short couch.

Phantom Hunter
 
RELH
See even us old guys find a knowledge nugget. That a good one.


"I have found if you go the extra mile it's Never crowded".
 

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