The Discovery Channel and TLC are combining forces and coming out with a new reality show called Man vs Child. The show features survivalist Bear Grylls stranded in day care centers across the world where he will document his efforts to survive and find a way out, usually requiring building overnight shelters during each episode.
EPISODE TEASER:
In the first installment Bear is seen skydiving out of a helicopter into the backyard of a day care center in rural New Jersey. Unfortunately he lands on a trampoline and is bounced into a feces-filled kiddie pool where he becomes entangled in the parachute cords and nearly drowns. With help from his crew he is pulled to safety with only minor twine burns and a bruised ego.
After getting his bearing and settling in, Bear attempts to subdue a hyperactive 5 year old who's had to much sugar. Unable to corral the youngster, Bear sets a snare between the coffee table and the couch. While waiting for the trap to catch its prey, he recounts the story of a group of yuppies that accidently found there way through a swing-in gate into a yard not far from here and were unable to get back out. After several days without Starbucks the group eventually succumbed to dehydration and eventually died.
With hunger settling in Bear makes a deadfall trap in the backyard and proceeds to catch the owners pet Collie. After skinning the dog with a shard from a broken beer bottle, Bear attempts to start a fire with a piece of flint and crack pipe. Undaunted by his failure, he uses some hot ashes tapped off a 6-year-olds? cigarette and soon has a roaring blaze. Once the local fire department douses the inferno, Bear turns his attention to shelter. Nightfall is fast approaching and its time to look for materials. Using the hide from the Collie and some used diapers from the dumpster, Bear builds himself a comfortable mattress and settles in for a good nights sleep. The stench is overpowering but there is nothing he can do about the smell of the Jersey air. The crew is whisked off in a rusted out Buick to spend the night in a nearby homeless shelter.
After a restless night of sleep Bear wakes up with ringing in his ears. Once the kids stop banging the door bell things begin to quiet down. Its time to get moving but he will encounter many obstacles in his attempt to escape the confines of the perimiter fence. Using the shadow cast by a Power Range action figure in the sweltering sun he is able to determine true north which should lead him out.
Join Bear as he navigates toddlers, swingsets, Slip n Slides, teeter totters, building blocks and Big Wheels.
I know, I know, to much time on my hands
