Most Embarrassing Moments?

[Feleno]

After this weekend and making one of the most memorable 'red-faced mistakes' in the past few years I had to ask. No I didn't leave the wife at the gas station again .
We were at REI getting some outdoor clothing. I found a nice pair of hiking pants and the wife found some cute shorts (on sale of course). She follows me to the dressing room area in the middle of the store. These are 3 small, joined cubicles all attached and are on wheels/casters. They bottom sit about 8-9 inches off the ground. I go into the first one, she goes in to the one I thought was next to me. Turns out there is another dressing area between us with an entrance on the opposite side. That part is important. So I finish putting on the new pants and pick up my jeans off the floor. I can see one of my wifes sock clad feet underneath the barrier in the next dressing room. So I'm going to scare her right? Just a little fun. I kneel down and grab her ankle with both hands and I said something I dont recall. Then she screams and yells "what the F--- are you doing you pervert, Security!!! Help! You sick pervert". It was at that precise moment I realized it wasnt my wife. Within a minute or two, 2 security officers from the store next door arrived as well as some management types. And the small incident had the attention of everyone in the store. It all got sorted out and was an innocent mistake and no harm done but geezus was I embarrassed. The only thing I'm thankful for is she turned out to be fairly ugly and the wife found that rather funny and jealousy didnt rear its ugly head. I got another story about the time I walked in on my parents.... October 1, 2005. Yep the date sticks with me. And the time I was giving a presentation to 15 employees and 10 vendors. That didnt end well either. Lets hear a few boys.......

 

[NMPaul]

Feleno the registered sex offender. Why are we not surprised.

 

[rutnbuck]

Feleno Tell them the rest of the story When ya walked in on your parents doing a little belly bumpping. Was ya thinking Horsey Ride?? So you climbed up on your dads back bucking away!!Tell them the part about when your mom started Moaning and Groaning. And you said hang on Daddy this is where the Milkmand and I got bucked off yesterday!!

Rutnbuck

 

[rutnbuck]

Years back I and the ex and kids took the boat out to a local lake. We had pulled back into the dock to go grab some lunch. Well I and the ex were walking up the dock and there was a couple knock out Bikini's walking down the dock towards us. The dock was only about 4' foot wide and was just wide enough for them to pass. As they went pass I turned around to get a tails eye view only to walk smack dab into a freaking steel post sticking up 4 foot in the center of the dock. I never see it and it knocked the wind out of me I fell down and my ex just laughed and said your such an idiot.

Rutnbuck

 

[Feleno]

LAST EDITED ON Jan-25-10 AT 09:04AM (MST)[p]NM
Registered? H#ll I didn't know I had to sign up somewhere. Info please.

Rutn
Dang its almost like you were there or something. Scary.
Good bikini story

 

[BeanMan]

Years ago I had a summer job in the San Luis Valley. I lived in the boss's home in a back room. One of my fellow employees was getting married in December after I had returned to school. A couple from Peru was there for the wedding and in my former room. The girlfriend and I stopped by the bosses to clean up for the wedding and I walked straight into 'my' old room only to be face to face with a naked Peruvian woman pulling up her nylons. Talk about red faced.

 

[TAGATTRACTER]

Great story F-er. I think I can beat it.

Many years ago at my small Christian High School graduation my Girlfriend told me about a surprise she had in mind. She told me that as I walked the stage to accept my diplomat she was gonna flash me. She was 4-5 rows back in the audience as I made my way up the steps. I could see her legs start to move, I was walking slowly staring like a sex starved teenager when , Wham. I walked right of the stage falling 4 feet to the football field grass.

 

[NVBighorn]

There was this one time at band camp...

 

[OutdoorWriter]

LAST EDITED ON Jan-25-10 AT 10:15AM (MST)[p]In the 1960s, I took on a part-time job doing in-home TV repair service calls at night. At the time I was in my early 20s.

Sooo...one day I get a scheduled call in Paradise Valley -- the very ritzy area of the Phx metro area.

At first, the name "Stoneham" didn't ring the proverbial bell.

The house sat atop a hill all by itself. I pulled up to the gate leading to the winding driveway, and pressed the intercom button to announce my arrival. The lady who answered pushed a magic button and the gate opened. Later, I found out it was the home of Horace Stoneham, who owned the San Francisco Giants at the time.

I parked, grabbed my tool kit and headed for the front door. That's when I noticed the entire exterior of the house was made of rocks that had all sorts of fossil shapes etched in them. I later asked about it, and Stoneham's wife told me the rocks were all imported from Texas.

As I walked through the door, I immediately notice the swimming pool in the LIVING room!! Actually, it was only partially in the living room. The rest of it was outside, but it had a thick glass wall that barely entered the water from above. So it was possible to swim either in or out of the house by going under the wall.

The TV itself was a console about 8' long and made of black onyx wood. So I set about repairing it despite almost getting a hernia when I moved it away from the wall.

When I was all done, Mrs. Stoneham asked if I could check the TV in her daughter's room because the picture would roll often. She showed me to the room and left me to be. I was there about five mins. when another door into the room opened and a very shapely and pretty young lady of 18 to 20 years old walked into the room.

The other door was to a bathroom, and she obviously had just gotten out of the shower. She had a towel wrapped around her head. Otherwise, she was stark naked!

As soon as I saw her, I turned my head and said "Whoops. Your mom wanted me to fix your TV. Sorry."

I almost fell over when she said, "Don't worry about it. You're not the first guy to see me naked. Do what you have to do."

She then went about putting on a robe, but she sure didn't rush about it. We then talked a bit as I worked on the TV. She told me she was home from college for spring break, so her mom probably forgot she was around. If I recall, her name was Mary.



TONY MANDILE

How To Hunt Coues Deer

 

[Feleno]

 

[cjboz]

I have one for you. My dad had kidney stones once and went to the doctor. While in there the doctor was going through his questions and asked if a STD could be the problem before they diagnosed him with kidney stones and there passing. Well the next week we see one of his buddies and he was telling him the story about the stones and they were laughing bout how they were wishing STDs were the problem in a joking wishful thinking manner of being a little more "active". Being a 3rd grader not knowing what all this talk was we were in the car later that week as a family and wanting to be a big boy I said "thats funny the doctor thought you had an STD dad" Talk about an evil look to my dad from mom and from dad to me! As soon as we got home I was given a very imperative talk about if I dont know what something is dont talk about it. My dad had a little explaining but it was easily taken care of, but I learned a lifelong lesson that day so did dad on drinking more water

 

[stinkystomper]

I rarely get embarrased cuz frankly I, for the most part, usually don't give a darned what people think about me. However there was one occasion when I actually embarrased myself really bad.

I had been working near Roswell NM, and had been up for about 3 days straight fighting a blow out on a gas well. I finally had enough and decided to call the wife and request dinner at a restaurant in that town. She was more than happy to meet me, and I was more than happy to spend time away from work. Well, I arrive at this really nice Mexican restaurant and was literally a walking zombie. I hadn't slept in 3 days and was totally exhausted. First thing that happened after I met my wife was the usual call of business. I had to relieve myself, and I needed to do so badly. I told her I was goin to the bathroom and would be right back. I go to the restroom area and walked right into the bathroom. I looked around to space myself from any other guys using the urinals cuz I'm always worried about some gay dude checkin me out. I noticed there weren't any urinals on the walls. I then noticed more than an ample amount of stalls all enclosed with walls. I thought cool, finally someone who built a bathroom where the guys don't have to worry about gay guys. I thought I was in Heaven. I go to the farthes open stall and proceed to take a leak. I then noticed all the other guys in the bathroom were all sitting on their pots. I thought great, now I get to hear everyone grunt and push and then smell what they are doing. So I hurry and finish and flush. I then proceed to the sink where this stupid girl was washing her hands. I thought, the nerve of this girl. She even has the audacity to finish washing her hands in the wrong bathroom! I glared out her with a death look till she left. I then proceeded to wash my hands. then out of the stalls that were being used walked 2 more girls. About the same time another girl walked in the door. I thought to myself WTF? I glared at all the women and mentioned to one of them that they were in the wrong restroom with a lot of anger in my voice. the girls glared back at me and never said a word cuz they could see I was a little disgruntled. I could also see they were ticked at me. I had just finished washing my hands when it hit me. The girls were all just standing there staring at me with jaws on the ground. I looked at all the stalls and no urinal on the wall and the fact that I was surrounded by women and realized I was the one in the wrong bathroom. I immediately told them oh crap! I'm in the wrong bathroom aren't I? They didn't say a word. I said I've been working for 3 days straight and am very tired. I had no Idea I was in the wrong restroom. I sincerely apologized the whole time I was backing out the door. I went and sat back at my table. One by one as the girls walked back out of the bathroom they would stare at me sitting there with my wife and start laughing. My wife finally said ok, what's going on? I was beat red and just wanted to be back out on the nightmare of a job.

 

[eelgrass]

One year I was on a deer drive with a bunch of other guys. On this particular drive I was assigned to a stand. Not like a tree stand, just a spot that deer used as an escape route.

I had been sitting on the ground with my back against a tree for about 15 minutes when I felt something crawling up my pant leg. It felt like something pretty big and it was moving fast! I panicked and jumped up and started to undo my pants. By then it had crawled up inside my boxers! I quickly yanked my pants and shorts down around my ankles but couldn't see anything. I was busy checking it out when I looked up to see one of the other guys standing about 30 yards away with a "WTF" look on his face.

I explained to him what I was doing but I could tell he wasn't buying it. Later back at camp he had to tell everyone of course.

To this day no one believes me.

Eel

Know guns, know peace, know safety. No guns, no peace, no safety.

 

[overton]

Me either.

 

[manny16]

hey eel?
what was you really doing?
lol............................................

soon the love in his heart will be the rage in his fist

Jesus is coming and boy is he pissed

 

[cbeard]

Them deer drives can get pretty boring sometimes,huh Eel?

 

[1911]

LAST EDITED ON Jan-25-10 AT 08:04PM (MST)[p]As the story goes, Eel beat that little bug like it owed him money.

 

[eelgrass]

I hate you guys. I really do!

Eel

Know guns, know peace, know safety. No guns, no peace, no safety.

 

[overton]

No you don't. Where else could you come to visit to ask for advice on how to take your bra off?

 

[eelgrass]

Dang Ransom, you have the memory of an elephant.

I hate you the most!

Eel

Know guns, know peace, know safety. No guns, no peace, no safety.

 

[rutnbuck]

Damn I needed a laugh Eel thanks.
I had the same problem as Stinky but not quite as bad. Walked in the Womens bathroom. A little girl about 10 was wipeing her hands. I am thinking to my self she is a little old to be in the mens room. She looked up and seen me. About the time we made eye contact she let out a blood curdleing scream. I looked around seen her mom and yikes. I know everybody in the restraunt heard. I scrambled out only to have every body looking at me.


Rutnbuck

 

[antlers4me]

when I came out sweating and gave the nurse my sperm sample she looked confused and said that they needed a urine sample not sperm.............................

 

[Zigga]

Hey stinky, I did the exact same thing.

Years ago my then girlfriend, went out to dinner and I got the urge to drop a duece. I sat down and a couple minutes later someone came in with a 3 year old. The little monster was staring at me through the hinge of the door when I heard his mother talking to him. Then more women came in. I quickly realized my mistake and how I had to time my exit just right. I did manage to leave without notice but not after breaking out into a cold sweat.

 

[albubba]

This story happened many years ago when my wife and I were first married. We rented an old farm house built around 1900.
Our bedroom was off of the frontroom and the only bathroom was down the hall. One Sunday morning I was getting ready for church in the bathroom. I didn't hear the knock on the door. Being that it was only my wife and I, I didn't have use for a robe and didn't think I needed a towel. I walked out of the bathroom and started towards the bedroom completely neked when I noticed the 2 young men, 12-13 years old, there to collect money for the church. Our eyes locked briefly and I dashed back into the bathroom. I waited until I heard the door shut and my wife came to the bathroom busting a gut. I wanted to kill her for not warning me.

 

[rutnelk]

Don't feel too bad albubba, I'm sure they didn't see too much and it wasn't even cold inside.

 

[feddoc]

LAST EDITED ON Jan-26-10 AT 02:00PM (MST)[p]Sort of along those lines...Several years ago fiance had told me she was coming over in about twenty minutes for some fun. So, I hop in the shower, get everything squeaky clean. Then I started drying off....when I hear the sound of a car in the driveway. A little early, but I'm ok with that.

Knock, Knock, I open the door and drop the towel in one motion and reach out to grab my fiance....only it wasn't my fiance, it was two Jehovah's Witness doing their thing. I wasn't embarrased in the least..but I did take the time to point out the no tresspassing signs posted in the driveway.



Compromise, hell! ... If freedom is right and tyranny is wrong, why should those who believe in freedom treat it as if it were a roll of bologna to be bartered a slice at a time?

 

[justr_86]

My mother in law walked in while I was in the shower. She said she thought her husband was in the shower. I didn't hear her come in. I was washing my hair and seen the shower curtain move and seen her standing there naked... She realized I'm not her husband and went o oOo staring down. Before I turned around and she shut the shower curtain.

I don't take showers there without triple checking the lock on the door.

 

[AZStickman]

"I don't take showers there without triple checking the lock on the door."

So Dad doesn't find you two?...... Terry

 

[sageadvice]

LAST EDITED ON Jan-26-10 AT 08:56PM (MST)[p]Fresh out of college, i took a high paying job in Mexico City as an executive at my girlfriends Chocolate Candies Factory and outlet store. We spent a lot of time in Acapulco but the first time we visited there, we no sooner got into her hotel like condo than we were at each other, on our knees...

After a amount of time had past and in a more composed condition, we realized that we hadn't bothered to shut the door to our lodging and what we'd been doing had been in complete view to any and all who'd walked down the hallway which was generally fairly busy!!

Joey

 

[crazeymaez]

Archive search Mar ,6,07 started by TTK good pics and stories.

 

[NVPete]

Here's mine: My job as a Park Ranger spanned more than 35 years, with a lot of winter time spent a Parks that had frozen over reservoirs. One particular day, I had been all over the ice, finding good, solid conditions with average thickness better than 8 inches. As I came close to the edge of a fishing dock, I overheard two old guys who were fishing there:"Boy, you'd never get me out on that ice!" I replied to them,"Guys, I weigh about 220 lbs., I've been all over the ice; it's plenty safe." What I didn't realize that there had been some warming and thawing around the very edge of the dock. As I jumped up and down for emphasis, about the third downstroke, I broke through clear up to my ranger hat. I'm not sure if it was shock of the fact of breaking through the ice, the embarrassment of the situation, or the fear, or the shock of the freezing cold water, but I was able to grab the edge of the dock and vault my body onto the flat dock, and immediately roll onto my feet. As the two fisherman rushed to my aid, I stood there saying "What an idiot!What an idiot! You guys must think I'm a real idiot!"
After I assured them I would be all right, that I wasn't going to die of hypothermia, and that the Ranger Station was close by for warmth and dry clothes,they profusely thanked me for creating a rather large ice fishing hole for them! For all the locals, they had great fun with this event. Every time winter would come around and the reservoir would start to freeze over, they would want to know, usually asking with a smirk, "Hey, Pete, how thick's the ice this year?",or "Been out on the ice yet?"