Governor Jerry Brown of California is jogging with his dog along a nature trail.
A coyote jumps out and attacks the Governor's dog.
1. Governor Brown starts to intervene, but then reflects upon the movie "Bambi" and realizes he should stop because the coyote is only doing what is natural. The coyote then kills the dog and bites the Governor.
2. The Governor calls animal control. Animal Control captures the coyote in a live trap and bills the State $200 testing it for diseases and $500 for trapping and relocating it.
3. The Governor also calls a veterinarian. The vet collects his dead dog and bills the State $200 testing it for diseases.
4. The Governor goes to hospital and spends $3,500 getting checked for diseases from the coyote and for getting his bite wound bandaged.
5. The running trail gets shut down for 6 months while Fish & Game conducts a $100,000 survey to confirm that the area is now free of dangerous animals.
6. The Governor spends $50,000 in tax-payer funds implementing a "coyote awareness program" for residents of the area.
7. Even though no rabies
is found, the California Legislature spends $2 million to study how to better treat rabies and how to permanently eradicate the disease throughout the world.
8. The Governor's security agent is fired for not stopping the attack. The State spends $150,000 to hire and train a new agent with additional special training concerning the nature of coyotes.
9. PETA protests the coyote's relocation and files a $5 million suit against the State.
Montana:
The Governor of Montana, Brian Schweitzer. is jogging with his dog along a nature trail. A Coyote jumps out to attack his dog.
1. The Governor shoots the coyote with his State-issued pistol and keeps jogging. The Governor has spent $0.50 on a .45 caliber ACP hollow point cartridge.
2. The Buzzards eat the dead coyote.
And that helps explain why California is broke and Montana is not.
A coyote jumps out and attacks the Governor's dog.
1. Governor Brown starts to intervene, but then reflects upon the movie "Bambi" and realizes he should stop because the coyote is only doing what is natural. The coyote then kills the dog and bites the Governor.
2. The Governor calls animal control. Animal Control captures the coyote in a live trap and bills the State $200 testing it for diseases and $500 for trapping and relocating it.
3. The Governor also calls a veterinarian. The vet collects his dead dog and bills the State $200 testing it for diseases.
4. The Governor goes to hospital and spends $3,500 getting checked for diseases from the coyote and for getting his bite wound bandaged.
5. The running trail gets shut down for 6 months while Fish & Game conducts a $100,000 survey to confirm that the area is now free of dangerous animals.
6. The Governor spends $50,000 in tax-payer funds implementing a "coyote awareness program" for residents of the area.
7. Even though no rabies
is found, the California Legislature spends $2 million to study how to better treat rabies and how to permanently eradicate the disease throughout the world.
8. The Governor's security agent is fired for not stopping the attack. The State spends $150,000 to hire and train a new agent with additional special training concerning the nature of coyotes.
9. PETA protests the coyote's relocation and files a $5 million suit against the State.
Montana:
The Governor of Montana, Brian Schweitzer. is jogging with his dog along a nature trail. A Coyote jumps out to attack his dog.
1. The Governor shoots the coyote with his State-issued pistol and keeps jogging. The Governor has spent $0.50 on a .45 caliber ACP hollow point cartridge.
2. The Buzzards eat the dead coyote.
And that helps explain why California is broke and Montana is not.
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